If there’s one thing Chicagoist hates, it’s unknowingly walking into a porn shop. Apparently it's a problem in Madison, Wis. A big problem. Thankfully, Madison Alderman Tim Bruer agrees, and he’s ready to do something about it – increase porn shop locations.

See, Bruer is big-picture type of guy. An outside-the-box thinker, if you will. First, he’s going to ask the City Council to increase the locations where adult entertainment shops can operate.

But that’s just the first part of his plan. He thinks the current zoning law is so strict that it could invite free speech challenges, and you know how those porn junkies love to fly the free speech flag. Well, if the law is more lenient, they can’t go crying about free speech now can they?

But wait. There’s more. Once that’s done, Bruer plans to ask the city to crack down on porn shops masquerading as so-called "gift shops." We can’t even tell you how many times we’ve innocently gone looking for a birthday card and gotten a face full of porn. And that’s just not right.

Because if a porn shop is masquerading as a gift shop, then, yes, you might walk into a store that looks like a gift shop and find yourself in a porn shop.

But if a gift shop is masquerading as a porn shop... Well, that's just terrible. Imagine going out to get your porn fix and finding yourself with nothing to choose from but postcards with famous buildings, mylar balloons that say "Happy Birthday" and "Over the Hill", and wrapping paper.

i don't care if it's chicago or madison, i just enjoyed the line "We can’t even tell you how many times we’ve innocently gone looking for a birthday card and gotten a face full of porn."

i laughed out loud. brilliant, joanna! a nice reprieve from the cubs really suck, generalissimo stroger is still alive, i hate yuppies in my hipster bar deabtes.

This reminds me of the time I tried to get married and ended up getting "gay married" by accident. Luckily, President Bush is working to make sure such confusion never happens again.

This reminds me of the time I tried to get married and ended up getting "gay married" by accident. Luckily, President Bush is working to make sure such confusion never happens again.

A friend of mine walked into Male Hide one time, thinking it was an Irish import store. There's a suburb of Dublin named Malahide, and that's what she read on the outside of the building instead of what it really says.

we do make occassional wi posts and indiana posts (see this week in stupid) along with our chicago and il posts. there are no sites in our network that cover those areas and sometimes we've just got something to say about what's happening there.

being a chicago-based wisconsinite, i appreciate the sarcastic blows chicagoist gives to the great dairy state once in a while (and that wasn't sarcastic).

This is cache, read story here